As my head accumulates its heavy chemo fog, it feels like an ideal time to reflect on all the incredible (and unique) gifts we’ve been blessed with to support us along the way. Like raising kids, the cancer journey is a marathon but feels so much more achievable with a strong community of loved ones surrounding and supporting you to the finish line.

Meanwhile, several people have privately reached out with news that a friend or family member has been recently diagnosed, and they’ve asked for counsel regarding different points of the journey.

One of those topics is this question: I have a loved one recently diagnosed. What are some good care package items I could offer them?

I combined some of our best gifts with others that several of you offered (several are acts of kindness rather than physical items) in hopes it would create “The Ultimate Gift List for Loved Ones with Cancer.” Some are specific to breast cancer, but most will apply to all types of cancer or trauma. Have more ideas to add? Share them with me!

I hope you find this resource helpful to bookmark or share with others!

 The Ultimate Gift List for Loved Ones with Cancer

• An Etsy Gift Card for a fresh batch of pretty, long earrings that offset chemo hats and bald heads

• Oncology-specific massage, acupuncture, or reiki gift packages. (This is wonderful because it keeps the chemo moving through our lymphatic system.)

• Special gifts for the spouse (a favorite dinner, a special outing for a break, etc.)

• Special gifts for the kid(s) (One friend got Henry an Amazon gift card for a new backpack at the end of summer. Another sent him a handwritten letter and a gift.)

• Puppy playdates and/or dog walking (Does the person have a dog? They probably can’t walk regularly. Helping with this creates a more peaceful environment at home.)

• Children playdates! We are perpetually exhausted. Enough said!

• Gift a house cleaning. It feels so good to have a sparkling house that probably hasn’t been deep-cleaned since pre-diagnosis!

• Anonymous financial gifts for use at the discretion of the person with cancer. This is tough for the family to ask for but hugely welcomed as many cancer-related expenses or lost income are realized.

• A great book or stack of magazines for those long, bed-ridden days

• Scarves, beanies, and chemo hats… This is a big one. See more info below!

• A personal visit or phone call. Nothing says “I love you” more than a personal visit. With that said, avoid surprise visits and make sure the loved one is feeling up to it. But even a cuddle with no words is welcomed. Laying in bed all day can get lonely.

• An encouraging text that ends with “No need to reply.” Sometimes replying to texts can feel overwhelming to a foggy chemo brain.

• A fun, big plastic cup for encouraging hydration. Some of my girlfriends got me this one.

• A cozy, fancy robe for lounging. There are also robes available that are made specifically for mastectomy recovery.

• Cozy, plush socks for lounging. Spoonful of Comfort is a great option.

• A custom website designed for updates that authentically represented me. Caring Bridge felt too “sickly” for me personally.

• Offering to disseminate information so the person with cancer can avoid dozens of texts and questions and focus on the task at hand

• Jewelry! Someone gave me a simple bracelet that said “Badass.” Another friend gifted me a beautiful necklace with a healing stone.

• Providing regular check-ins. It makes the person with cancer not feel forgotten.

• Offering to drive the person with cancer to appointments.

• Hosting a pre-chemo Girls Party to show the person with cancer she is supported and loved

• Grocery deliveries. Especially organic soups, juices, or smoothies.

• A heated blanket or heating pad for bone aches

• Quality bath salts for bone aches (non-scented is best because our sense of smell can be impacted, much like during pregnancy)

• Fun decaf teas (sometimes coffee is too acidic to sit well on our stomachs)

• A small green plant or living flower to brighten up a room

• A framed photo of a happy picture or an inspiring quote

A Word on HeadGear

I love wearing light bamboo caps around the house, regular beanie hats when I go outside, and pretty silk scarves when dressing up.

Bamboo Hats – These are the ones I love the most because they are very lightweight and not too tight. It almost feels like I’m not wearing anything but also gives me a similar layer of warmth that a head of hair otherwise would. I don’t personally wear them outside the house because, to me, they scream, “Chemo person here!” But I have several of them for my time at home.

Beanie Hats – I love the feeling of normalcy these hats provide. Slouchy hats are still trendy and also comfortable and warm. Cashmere is the most comfortable, but I also like this one.

Silk Scarves – Silk scarves have been such a fun discovery that I plan to continue after my hair grows back. But there are a few things to know:

• Real silk is the best because it folds easily and lays better. Cheap satin-silk is thicker and doesn’t fold as well. It’s also shinier and is more attention-drawing, which is a downside. So, stick with real silk. Etsy and Poshmark are great resources for silk scarves, and friends have found great ones at local antique stores as well.

• Scarf Volumizer Turbans are the best-kept secret! They keep your head warm while also providing some volume that makes the scarf look like it’s naturally wrapped around a head of hair instead of a bald head. I use this one.

• Always look for scarves that are SQUARE and ideally at least 24” x 24.” This will provide enough surface area so plenty of scarf remains to tie a knot on the lower back of your head.

 Happy love-gifting!

With love,

Evie